Find out each other’s bottom line
Anna has been in intention and a large business cooperation, with great difficulty to find a friend to help introduce, finally, general manager of this enterprise took time from his busy schedule, he agreed to go to Anna arranged at the hotel party. Anna is very happy, it was decided that a golden opportunity to get things done, but she also struggled, general manager of the lady invited to the party.
Two of the most important guests, both came to the party, general manager nearly middle-aged couple, but could see were well-maintained. Anna saw the general manager and then general manager praised his wife, he said:
“Madame really elegant, extraordinary temperament, presumably son, daughter but also as parents generally excellent. Ventured to ask, I do not know the general manager has several lovely child?”
This question does not matter, really very presumptuous. General manager of the couple have also smiling face, and shortly became a liver-colored, very ugly. Mrs. deliberately turned away, pretending not to hear, and one of the guests beside chatting. General manager can not be avoided, keep silent and looked at Anna, reach for table wine in one gulp.
Originally, the general manager of couples unable to have children as being distressed, and even decided to divorce. Anna inadvertently questioning she lost a good opportunity this collaboration, wasted a banquet table and a night time.
“Know thyself, know yourself.” If even the people did not get a clear idea of the ins and outs, it is likely to produce many unnecessary misunderstandings in the process of interaction. Thus, it is necessary to prepare and deal with others before inquire about each other’s situation, on the other side have a general understanding of the basic situation. Touched the bottom of others, he said things have an end.
Now more and more ways of information dissemination, “without leaving, also known world affairs”, you can use a variety of channels to obtain information and other related information.
Best way is to grasp first-hand information to other people about, to different people inquire.
1. To inquire about the people around him
Around him and his contacts more frequent, his habits, manners, ideas, family background and so are more familiar with, to bring together the most basic information, then you can probably understand this human nature and experienced . If the story of Anna can advance to inquire about the situation of his friend and general manager, including his family members, living conditions, personal taboo, then this unpleasant things would not happen.
2. To find out his opponent
Of course, the angle is not the same for each person stand evaluation will naturally be different. In order to more fully understand his situation, you may also wish to inquire about his opponent, you may get very different answers in turn.
To be more objective, comprehensive, you find out who the better, other family, friends, colleagues, classmates, neighbors and so can ask. It is important, it is necessary to get the information together, a person can not just listen to the words of the letter!
If you have face to face, you do not get someone else’s “intelligence”, but you still have a chance, that is, your intuition and keen observation, presumably his character from his words and deeds and external temperament, hobbies, background. If you can not be sure he has a certain understanding, then you better behave conservative. Best not to ask too deep topic, try to avoid talking about their own thing clear, especially each other’s **. If the other party is not convenient to answer hastily raised problems that may cause embarrassment, resulting in communication barriers, can also cause other side of displeasure, disgust and repulsion on you.
More and talk to strangers
A silver-haired woman often appear on Times Square in New York. Many people suspect that she came to this walk, some exercise or something, there are people that she might homeless. But things are not like that.
Saw the face tears of children, she will take the initiative came to ask: “You are not looking for your mother to die how can I help How about you??”
She would pat eyeful melancholy girl’s shoulder, and asked: “!? Poor child tell me what you are sad thing.”